THERE'S NO REASON NOT TO BE HAPPY

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I look at this picture and think of Benjamin Britten's great Serenade for Tenor Solo, Horn and Strings, Op. 31. He sets poetry to music and there's a particularly haunting one about a rose by William Blake. It starts with " O Rose, thou art sick...". Just like the Human Spirit, it's sacred beauty can still hurt you with its hidden thorns as well as attract the invisible worm to sap you. It is impossible to fully let go and trust.

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I see you're becoming aware of people noticing you. You told me the older kids know you are related to famous people. They want your Uncle Nicolas's autograph. They tease you about your last name being on wine bottles as they offer to carry your backpack. They're not in your class or even grade for that matter. You wonder why they think you're so important. It does make you feel kind of special, but weird at the same time, because you really didn't do anything. You look at the lonely kid in the corner of the playground that nobody's noticing. You feel bad for him. You want to be his friend, not theirs.

The juggling has suddenly gotten a bit too heavy for me. My batteries are run down. It's time to recharge. This happens periodically. The difference this time is that the little marshmallow man is nowhere in site. My confidence and determination are very strong and right on course. Come to think of it, the last time the little marshmallow man paid me a visit I was doing three things at once. It wasn't easy, but I accomplished a lot especially with the help of my wife, my business partner and the great PlasterCITY team. I'm sure I roasted the little guy with the huge walls of fire needed to do the BOO YA TRIBE video for my film. Maybe, I'll never see him again, but if I do I'm more than ready.


Little marshmallow man almost a year ago.

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FATHER AFC WITH SONS NKC, MAC, CRC

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FOR NOW ON I WILL ONLY WORK WITH PEOPLE QUALIFIED FOR THE JOB. I WILL BE FAIR BUT MUCH MORE DISCERNING. THE MORE ALTRUISTIC MY IDEAS BECOME, THE TOUGHER MY SKIN WILL BECOME. I WANT THESE IDEAS TO SUCCEED FOR THE BENEFIT OF ALL. I'VE HELPED A LOT OF "SO CALLED" FRIENDS, MANY HAVE GOTTEN INTO THE D.G.A., AND FOR WHAT? ONLY TO HAVE MY ASS BITTEN YET AGAIN. BEWARE, I AM NOW IN WARRIOR MODE.


SELF PORTRAIT DURING A PRIVATE MOMENT OF INTENSE REFLECTION

Eric Bright - the crisp on the move Vegas boy John Gulager - the disheveled "smells like a fish rot" Santa man

Together they plan to get some fresh candid publicity shots of me to promote our upcoming shows. Like I said, I like extremes.

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It must be pretty damn weird being my assistant, especially since I have a reputation as a mean eccentric. I want to thank her for working hard and keeping the PlasterCITY spirit alive. She's a good egg with a lot of producer potential.
Evelyn Belasco in "CRC Eccentric Vision"

THE ROUNDER CAME KNOCKING AT MY DOOR IN THE HOPE FOR FAME AND FORTUNE. THE ROUNDER BOUGHT HIS WAY INTO MY INNER CIRCLE IN THE HOPE FOR FAME AND FORTUNE. TRY TO SELL A SCRIPT HERE, DO A LITTLE ACTING THERE, GET SOME PRODUCING CREDITS. WHAT THE ROUNDER DID NOT REALIZE IS THAT I CARE NOTHING FOR FAME AND FORTUNE. MY VALUES ARE NOT THE ROUNDER'S VALUES. AND WHAT I HAVE BEGUN TO LEARN IS THAT ONE SHOULD NEVER GET TOO CLOSE TO A ROUNDER, BECAUSE WHEN THE OPPORTUNE TIME COMES THEY WILL ALWAYS TRY TO BITE YOU IN THE ASS. IT IS FOREVER IN THE ROUNDER'S NATURE.

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WE WANT TALENTED STUDENT FILMMAKERS!

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I look at this photo frequently. It reminds me of all my ideas that will never hatch. They ferment in my brain like a priceless cavier. I'm able to sample it in my mind and new ideas are born.

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His polarized glasses had to be at least 1/4" thick. Why? Because he is a fanatic film scholar. He lives only to watch movies. I remember him once telling me, "The world of great cinema would thank me if I put a bullet in the head of Lucas and Spielberg". That's a bit extreme. But look at Hollywood now. There are more big budget action playstation films with explosions and weak scripts made than ever before. A film like "The Godfather" would never be a blockbuster hit today. The masses don't have the attention span for it. It's a vicious cycle.

Governor Bill Richardson/myself

The Gov's making things happen in the Land of Enchantment. New Mexico is ready to play hardball with Canada and we American filmmakers are very interested. New Mexico is going to be a new filmmaking mecca. I can't wait to be there next year with Macbeth.

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I've been told that my ideas are ruffling feathers in various high places, especially since we can totally execute and will. I've never backed down from an important fight, only the unimportant, waste of time fights. I love pressure. I feed on it.

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These guys are my favorite rap group. They wrote the closing song for my film "Bloodhead". Check out their new album "West Koasta Nostra". One day they'll be guest stars on BikerChef. They make an awesome Samoan underground pig and ride with the best of them.

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Julie McManus copyright 1983 / Trish Tokar copyright 2002

I'm embarrassed that I looked like such a wuss back in '83. I was edging a little too far on the effeminate side. I left school and toughened up quick in the real world. Now the romantic poet's gone and the pirate poet reigns.